COLOR PHOTO I_7108 PRETTY WOMAN SITTING AT COMPUTER TYPING

This essay first appeared in the collection From Net, City, World to Cloud, Market, Sea. Published by Distanz and Zentrum für Netzkunst, the anthology features writing by artists and researchers to create a history of the World Wide Web using the six keywords in the title. You can purchase a copy here.

September 2018

I used to own a plain black skirt that had an image of a woman’s buttocks (in panties) printed on the back. This illusory garment was meant to make the wearer appear as if they weren’t wearing any bottoms, potentially prompting a double-take from someone walking by. The skirt was an impulse purchase and I got rid of it a few years ago during one of my periodic closet purges. I’m not sure what compelled me to donate it. Was it a momentary distancing from myself—a desire to be someone who didn’t own a piece of clothing that could double as a childish prank? Over the past year, I have casually engaged in searches for the skirt—or something like it—on resale websites like Ebay. It’s funny how hard it is to articulate exactly what I’m looking for in the search bar, typing in phrases such as “butt skirt,” “panty skirt,” “panty photo skirt,” “butt prank skirt,” and “underwear illusion skirt.”

Despite trying all of these combinations of keywords, I haven’t been able to find what I’m looking for. Instead, I’m met with links to buy lingerie, fetish wear, see through skirts, and skirts with built-in underwear. During one of these empty handed pursuits, I included the keyword “photo” in the search bar and happened upon an Ebay seller named kathysstuff1. I can’t recall the exact product that led me to them. Was it COLOR PHOTO I_2638 VIEW BEHIND WOMAN IN SKIRT? Maybe it was RISQUE PHOTO I_3370 LOW VIEW OF WOMAN IN SKIRT AND PANTIES?

Kathysstuff1 deals in found photographs, the kind you might find at a flea market or antique store. Almost all of the 46,370 photos listed on their storefront are of women: women posing in their homes; women on vacation; women in cars; women sitting on top of cars; women with their hands in front of their face asking to not be photographed. The photos are taken by friends, loved ones, boyfriends, and amateur photographers. Occasionally, a photo of a celebrity will slip into the mix but it is treated the same as any of the others. For example, a professional studio portrait of Jennifer Lopez is titled COLOR PHOTO I_6530 PORTRAIT OF PRETTY WOMAN. The term “pretty” adorns any image description where a woman’s face is visible: pretty woman sitting in chair holding cat; pretty woman smoking cigarette; pretty woman dressed as witch; pretty woman posed from side. Each image is scanned and stamped with a KathysStuff watermark before being listed for sale. Prices range from $3.98 to $9.98 for an individual photo, though they’ll give you a 30% discount if you bundle them.